Pause to Feel Your Breath, It Won’t Be There Forever

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Here is one of the mistakes people often make: they invest all their time and energy getting somewhere, aligning the dots so they can achieve the thing that in and of itself won’t really make them happy.

Achievements look good on paper, resumes, CVs and perhaps in the first 2-3 minutes when you meet someone new and try to impress them.  But listing  what you achieved won’t connect you to another human, in fact, it will most likely keep you at distance. This isn’t because the achievements are unworthy, but because reading any type of list doesn’t really evoke an emotion and move another.

I have been a victim of this myself for so long and even with all the beautiful moments of feeling in touch with my inner spirit, with the divine, I fell for the urge to express myself through the number, the zip code, or the 15 second pitch.  I have wasted countless hours trying to figure out how to speak about myself that impresses people the most.  Just today I was intimidated to share my real truth with a friend and had an insight: maybe I intimidate people in this way too.

I am not even done looking for ways to impress the world.  Though now, I have a fancier word for it: I am anchoring myself in what is already true about me so that people are willing to look, listen and buy what I have to offer.  

All this is going through my head tonight as I am trying to go to bed, beat, tired, with skin breaking out, messy hair, sick husband next to me and kids finally asleep after being sick for 2 weeks.  And then it hit me, and I admit – not for the first time:

 What is up with the crazy chase?  Where are we heading while mindlessly ordering presents for people we barely even talk to?  Why are so impatient, we can’t even give people space to respond in their own time because we know it takes a second to send a text and we feel entitled to their time?  When will we fit in all the things we want to do? Who can help us and when and why isn’t that already happening?  The list goes on.

Can we just stop for a moment to notice and show gratitude for still breathing, to feel our breath and appreciate the magic of it being there whether we consciously choose to inhale?  What if we take that breath and look around, appreciate the path that led us here, acknowledge where our chest feels tight, affinity is lost or even to just allow ourselves to imagine what it would look like if we knew, and owned, that we are truly the creators. 

I am allowing myself to feel what it feels like to be exactly here where I am: car noise outside, sound of a heater kicking in, someone on our floor closing the door loudly.  My boys are asleep, my husband is out and I am going to end here so I can go rest too.  Can you stop to see what is already all around you too?  

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